Overall impression: Thailand is pretty amazing. Temples, beaches, stunning natural beauty abounds pretty much everywhere. That said, there were some parts I enjoyed more than others, and some that burned themselves into my brain for all different sorts of reasons.
I really thought I was going to die in Bangkok. The first day, I couldn’t believe how dangerous every street crossing seemed to be: endless lanes of cars and motorcycles and tuk-tuks whizzing by with no apparent regard for pedestrian life. I was terrified to cross every street, truly feeling I was taking my life into my hands and wondering if I would ever live to see the beaches I’d come to Thailand for. In the end, I learned to be more aggressive and fearless and simply jump out with others when there was a brief break in car traffic, but it was an unsettling experience for sure.
My main impression of Bangkok: it was hot. Really, really hot. I have never been hotter in my life than in the day we spent tramping through the city’s temples, which should have impressed me much more and instead, sadly, just felt like impediments to my getting inside to air conditioning. I could admire them, but my physical discomfort was so strong that it sapped a lot of the excitement out of what I was seeing. Also, the crowds…at least at the Grand Palace, the first sight we saw, were out of control. Wat Pho temple proved much quieter, which was a welcome relief, as was the air conditioned massage pavilion where I got a foot massage for $9. Sweet.
On to Phuket. This exceeded my expectations in every way. So many people told me I would hate it because it was trashy, touristy, etc. But the truth is, Phuket has a natural beauty that nothing can really diminish. It also helped that our beach, Kata, was gorgeous and largely unpeopled, so we didn’t have to fight the crowds to enjoy it.
Koh Phi Phi, sadly, was a different story. Almost surreally beautiful, but largely dominated (at least the parts we saw) by selfie-stick wielding tourists who seemed not to want to take in the beautiful place they were seeing, but to snag their latest facebook profile picture there. I did my best to ignore them and appreciate how stunning the water and beaches were, but much like the Bangkok heat, my distaste for them seeped into my bones and marred the experience for me a bit. Looking at my photos, I can appreciate Phi Phi’s beauty far more than I was able to while I was actually standing in the middle of it. Oh, irony.
My big adventure of the trip was riding an elephant, which was quite an amazing yet frightening experience. It’s one of those things that sounds cool in theory; then you’re actually seated in a rickety seat a story off the ground on the back of an animal and you realize just how dicey a proposition it really is. Clearly, I was the only one who felt this way; everyone else on our trip seemed to have a wonderful time and not fear death-by-elephant-ride at all, which made me question my own fears…bringing up another subject I’ll detail a bit more below.
On my last day in Phuket, I decided to dedicate myself to pampering. I began with a five-star spa experience—1 ½ hours of apricot body scrub and massage at one of the fanciest hotels on the island. And oh, it was worth it. Not only was the massage incredibly relaxing, but the setting—lying in an open room with the sun-dappled trees and birdsong outside, just feet from the ocean—was divine. Then I went and had lunch at the hotel restaurant, with a view of the ocean that, in the words of one friend, looked like the kind of panorama that would inspire people to change their life plans and remain on vacation forever. I kept looking around at the awesome sea and beach view, grinning from ear to ear, just wanting to take it all in and remember for as long as I could how stunningly beautiful a vista it was. I want to be able to draw on that view of Phuket for the rest of my life whenever I need a pick me up, a reminder of how much beauty there truly is in the world.
It’s my new happy place.
So, those are my big impressions and memories of my Thailand adventure. But I also encountered a few revelations (to be dramatic) about myself, my travel style, and my life. Here they are, summed up briefly:
- I realized that, the older I get, the more I feel the impact of external factors on my enjoyment of a place. Crowds, heat, tired aching feet; even long plane rides bother me more than they used to (though I did survive 40 hours roundtrip in economy class). I think I need to accept that I don’t have the same pluck or determination to power through things that I did as a twenty-something hostel stayer, and accommodate my travel plans accordingly. Shorter flights (when possible), nicer hotel rooms, and lots of AC are necessities for me now. And that’s okay.
- One thing that struck me—and frankly, bothered me—on this trip was how scared I became by a number of the relatively routine experiences that everyone else seemed to love. I’ve always considered myself a fairly adventurous person, at least in some ways—what with my habit of traveling around the world solo and all that. But riding an elephant terrified me, even if I was able to enjoy it in a perverse way by the end of the ride. I wouldn’t even get near the baby tigers, as everyone else was happily petting them (kids included). Even snorkeling, which I always loved, proved scary when I was dropped off a boat in the middle of deep water with rolling waves I felt were about to suck me under. That day on the boat in Koh Phi Phi was the second time, post-Bangkok traffic, I really thought I could die on this trip—and I realized I was the only one in the group who had these worries. All my traveling companions seemed totally fine. This really unsettled me. I don’t like thinking of myself as a fearful person, especially if those fears could potentially interfere with something I really want to do. I’ve decided that, to counteract the fears that bubbled up on my Thailand trip, I need to make a conscious effort to do something that I’ve always been curious about but which has always scared me. I need to look my fears in the face and conquer them, to regain my self-respect and image of myself as strong and capable. So what’s the answer? Scuba diving! I’ve always been curious about it but the idea of being submerged under water with an oxygen tank makes me deeply uncomfortable. Time to do something about that. The next chance I get, I plan to take a vacation someplace where I can get certified and learn to scuba dive. It should be terrifying yet thrilling at once. Time to conquer my fear and woman up!
- My biggest revelation came while lying on a beach in Koh Phi Phi at the end of the day. I was relaxed, happy, feeling great. The day had been full of madding crowds, but the beach was lovely and I’d had time to swim and snorkel and was now lying in a deck chair, eating watermelon and looking out at the beautiful water and shoreline and observing the bubbling activity around me. A pretty perfect Wednesday afternoon. Relaxing on that beach, I realized how fortunate I am to have had the opportunity to be there, to travel halfway around the world to Thailand and experience this stunning place. I had the good luck to have had experiences and privileges that 99 percent of the people in the history of the world cannot even imagine. And I am very, very appreciative of that. But lying there on the beach in Koh Phi Phi, I also realized the importance of balance—not just in the traditional meaning of work and life, but in what we give and what we get. Travel, I realized, is what I get from the world; the opportunity to explore this amazing planet we live on, which is an incredible privilege I know how fortunate I am to have. But in exchange for this, I need to give the world back as much as I can in return. Whether it’s through a job where I get to help people (hopefully) in some small way, or volunteering, or just doing my utmost to be the best person and version of myself I can be, I need to keep striving to contribute something meaningful to the world, and not give up even when the work gets hard and I get discouraged. Travel is a wonderful break from reality, but it needs to be more than that; it can and should be an impetus for us to want to give the best of ourselves to the world. And going forward, that’s just what I intend to do.
Anyway, the moral of this story is—go to Thailand! Revelations and resolves aside, it was a fantastic trip, and I feel I only scratched the surface of this fascinating country. I’m already planning a return visit someday (something I very rarely do!) and hope to hit up some new places, Chiang Mai, Koh Samui, and Koh Tao (scuba diving mecca!) among them. I don’t know when it will happen, but I am already happily anticipating another chance to explore the Land of Smiles, peel back more layers, and experience even more of its wonder and beauty. And if you’re anything like me, I can’t encourage you strongly enough to do the same.